Oh boy!! Finally some alone time! Daddy’s off with Uncle Greg and I feel like my soul can come out to play for a while, that it can just be free to let all things be as they are. Many years ago I built a fortress around my heart against your father, and some of those walls still remain. Your birth sure removed a chunk, and your presence in our lives seems to be continuing to help this process along.. Your dad is a very loving man, and there really is no need for them anymore.

Anyway, I listened to my ‘fluffy’ music, the stuff I like to sing, dance, meditate and write to you to. You were in your playpen watching me ‘play’. I danced around the living room in an ecstasy of love, while you lay there taking it all in. What on earth do you think of that?? What kind of an impression does that make on you? You do seem to enjoy these love poems of movement and beauty for God.

On a completely different note (ding!), we had your first trip to emergency. You woke up around 5 AM with this horrible barking cough and really bad wheezing in between. I called the nurses hotline, and after our conversation, I had to go to emergency. It was croup, a viral inflammation of the upper chest airways. So you got some meds, and an oxygen mask which I had to hold on your face for about 10 minutes. YOU.DID.NOT.LIKE.THAT!!!!! I managed to hold it in place though, and sang and whistled Grandpa’s song to you, exchanging the word grandpa for mommy, loud enough for you to hear over the mask. And as long as you could hear me, you didn’t go into freak out mode, and you even began to relax after they slowed down the flow a bit. I got one of your very precious smiles, a very precious moment indeed! And you haven’t barked like a seal since. All that tooth cutting sure seems to play havoc with you, but you still want to be happy, don’t you? Thank you for your smile. It makes my day, and renews my strength. I lovey love you soooo much!

Next:  a happy boy