January 2006 - Life’s Crusties
After watching you eat, I realize that no matter what, no matter how I try to keep you clean, you are going to get dirty. It’s a given. You can’t avoid it. But it’s best to clean it up right away, before the goo is too stuck on. When I leave the food on your face too long, it becomes hard and crusted, and it’s hard to clean, and sometimes causes you pain during the cleansing process. Metaphorically speaking, I refer to my choice in attitudes, my emotional and mental responses. I make mistakes. I screw up. It’s not the end of the world. If I have wronged another, if I have ‘made a mess’, it is important to me that I clean it up as soon as possible. The longer I leave it, the longer the mess remains unattended to, the harder and crustier the shell it creates, and the more painful it is to “clean”.
Today at lunch I started reading the Upanishads to you. Maybe this isn’t the time to do it (smiles)!! Somehow the reverence and sacredness gets lost amid your cries, burps, grunts and me asking if you are poopy in between verses.
The other night we went to a Robbie Burns dinner at GG’s. Man, I wish I’d had a camera. I’m not sure what you thought of the bagpipes, but you seemed intrigued by them. I ate haggis tonight. Haggis is sheep’s lung, heart and liver ground up with spices and something else, and then boiled in water, encased in a sheep’s gut. Yuck, you say? It was interesting. I found I could ‘stomach’ it (haha) if I diffused the flavour with a lot of potatoes. Not something I’ll rush out and buy. You were pretty tired, as you hadn’t napped all day, and you sure let everyone know it. The seniors love seeing babies. You made one man’s night by giving him a huuuuuge smile. He lit up so beautifully!! GG loves you so much. You smile so big for her too. She has decided that she hopes to live long enough to see you walk. I hope she will too. She sure loves your visits, and gives you such big kisses, and laughs with you. She loves you so much. And so do I, my dearly beloved and precious son, so do I. I just cant wait til you wake up in the mornings so I can hold you again. In a way, it’s kind of special that you don’t walk or crawl yet. I get the baby snuggles longer. I waited a long, long time for you John, and I’m going to squeeze as much joy out of our life together as I can!
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